8.8.14

Hello. Goodbye.

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There are two ways to approach this.
Two equally true realities.
Two truths that stare me in the face every day.
Two rituals that I have been forced to live in with an urgency that many are not forced into. 

And I think that both are equally necessary to living a healthy life of relationships. 

Hello.
Goodbye. 

As a missionary kid, I have lived my life in the space between and within these two words. 

Hello.
Goodbye.

As an adult who has friends that I sort by continent, I face these overwhelming feelings on a daily basis.

Hello.
Goodbye.

I spent a long time fighting these realities. I refused to say hello for fear of having to say goodbye. I refused to embrace places, people, feelings because I did not want to have to let them go. I refused to process goodbyes, preferring to ignore them, trapping myself in the tiny space outside of hello and goodbye. 

Hopefully, I am learning a different way of living. Learning to live in the space between and within the hello and the goodbye. Because these realities are not unique to the experience of a global nomad. Everyone has to face the twin realities of hello and goodbye.
Of birth and death.
Of now and then.
Of yesterday and today and tomorrow.
Of things loved,
Things lost,
Things gained.

Life lived.
Life yet to be lived. 

I believe that the fullest life is lived within these realties. To ignore either one is to refuse to experience life as it really is. 

Hello.
Goodbye.

I have heard two 'inspirational' statements that reflect a life lived in these realities.
How would you live if today were your last day? 
Live like you are going to live forever. 

Allow me to explain. 
If today were my last day, I would tell everyone I love that I love them.
I would worry more about whether my son needs a book read to him than if the dishes need washed.
I would make sure to tell the person I am standing in front of that they are valuable. 
If today were my last day, I would hug my husband and hold my daughter and care more about moments than dollars.

But if I were going to live forever, then I would plant a tree. 
I would make sure my son was learning how to say 'please' and 'thank you.'
I would make jam and fill my pantry for next winter.
I would make my house a home. 
I would start a garden. 

If I live only like today is my last day, then I never invest in tomorrow. I never embrace life where I am, never put down roots, never dig deep and make sure my friendships will last the long run. If I live only in the Goodbye, I will forget to embrace Hello.

If I live only like I will live forever, I will worry constantly about tomorrow. I will pass over today because I am too busy planning for the future. I might forget to tell the person I'm facing how much they are worth, because I have all the time in the world. If I live only in the Hello, I will forget to prepare for the Goodbye.

Life is lived to the fullest only in the space between and within both the Hello and the Goodbye. These equal  realities can govern a life lived lived fully embracing today and fully investing in tomorrow. 

Hello.
Goodbye.

Eternity.
And now.

Two sides of the same coin. 
Two truths. 
The push and pull,
The dance of a full life.